The other day I learnt the artist and title of the theme music to the Hitchhiker's guide to the Galaxy: The Journey of the Sorcerer by The Eagles. It's a very cool piece of music, with a nice combination of the banjo with more modern elements.
In other music related news, it would appear that there is a Britney Spears song that I do like. No further comment on this at this time
I'm back on centrelink money. It went pretty smoothly. I had to fill out an extra form because one of my housemates is a girl. The form seems to be mostly checking to make sure couples don't pretend to be separate to get extra money from the government.
New episodes of Family Guy have started being shown.
As you might be able to tell, I haven't been out much since I got back to Australia. Part apathy, part can't be bothered (another form of apathy), part can't be damned (yet another form of apathy). I did do a little bit of shopping today. I got fed up with not having enough coathangers, and so decided to buy some more. I also got some new drinking glasses, as the ones I used to have mysteriously disappeared during or soon after our housewarming party. The new ones aren't so large, but there are six of the as opposed to the surviving two of the old ones.
Almost distracted myself with a game of nethack, but resisted temptation.
I've started thinking about writing some fiction. I've had ideas in the past, but never really developed them in the past. Perhaps I should write some up as entries here and then patch them together when something gets finished. Could make for some very confusing reading. In fact I will. The question is do I restart my Buffy/The Phantom crossover story, or my philosophical piece on the merits of the monarchy. Why not both? Look forward to many (well a few) interesting characters.
On blog related notes, it seems Darth Vader has a blog. It's very well written, but it is a slightly different spin on the character.
Wednesday, May 04, 2005
Saturday, April 30, 2005
Mass doses of culture
On Thursday I got a bit more culture than I normally do. Not only did I go to a movie, I also went and saw a play.
The movie was Hitchhikers Guide to the Galaxy. I was a bit worried that things would not be well with this, as I tend to be very dissappointed by people who try to make books into movies. Be Cool, a movie I saw about a month ago, was a shocking example of this. But the hitchikers movie was good. It was different to the book, but the book was different to the radio show, the tv show, the computer game and the towel, so making changes for the new medium is not something wrong for the guide. However, when the opening titles started I was reassured. The song is brilliant, and works so well. I was a bit dissappointed by Zaphod's two heads and third arm, but overall the movie was good. Magrathea was marvelous. All round a good film
The play was The Taming of the Shrew. I managed to pick up some free tickets so off I went. They set it in 1940's New York rather than italy a few centuries ago. It worked rather well I thought.
End of Post
Writing time: 20 minutes
The movie was Hitchhikers Guide to the Galaxy. I was a bit worried that things would not be well with this, as I tend to be very dissappointed by people who try to make books into movies. Be Cool, a movie I saw about a month ago, was a shocking example of this. But the hitchikers movie was good. It was different to the book, but the book was different to the radio show, the tv show, the computer game and the towel, so making changes for the new medium is not something wrong for the guide. However, when the opening titles started I was reassured. The song is brilliant, and works so well. I was a bit dissappointed by Zaphod's two heads and third arm, but overall the movie was good. Magrathea was marvelous. All round a good film
The play was The Taming of the Shrew. I managed to pick up some free tickets so off I went. They set it in 1940's New York rather than italy a few centuries ago. It worked rather well I thought.
End of Post
Writing time: 20 minutes
Monday, April 25, 2005
Stop attrocities because they make me feel bad
I'm currently in Kanchanaburi. For those whose knoledge of geography derives from movies, think the Bridge on the River Kwai. And of course there are museums wiht info on all of this, how many people died, where the railroad went, etc. One thing I did learn was teh the Netherlands were involved in the war in the Pacific, which kind of makes sense when you remember all the stuff about the Dutch East Indies and so forth, but I guess most of the time everyone concentrates on the big 5, England, America, France, Germany and Russia. I suppose the Netherlands also to part in the war in Europe, but I have no idea what it was.
The thing that most affected me though was walking throught the PoW cemetary. In the cemetary are buried nearly 7000 people who died during WWII. I thought I would be able to have a leisurely stroll throught eh cemetary, read the names, look at the monuments etc. But the place got to me. Normally, I'm ok with all things militaristic. I like things that make big bangs, and I know a few ways of making big bangs. But stuff like that brings home that no matter how fast the things fly or how big the bangs, the things should not be used.
Although people die every day, no one should hasten the rate at which it happens. That is the greatest tragedy. Not the ruined buildings, or any other destruction. The taking of so many lives is horrendous, and should not be allowed.
The thing that most affected me though was walking throught the PoW cemetary. In the cemetary are buried nearly 7000 people who died during WWII. I thought I would be able to have a leisurely stroll throught eh cemetary, read the names, look at the monuments etc. But the place got to me. Normally, I'm ok with all things militaristic. I like things that make big bangs, and I know a few ways of making big bangs. But stuff like that brings home that no matter how fast the things fly or how big the bangs, the things should not be used.
Although people die every day, no one should hasten the rate at which it happens. That is the greatest tragedy. Not the ruined buildings, or any other destruction. The taking of so many lives is horrendous, and should not be allowed.
Confessions of a reader
I've recently read an extracted version of the Confessions of St Augustine. One of the reasons I picked it up at the airport was because my high school was named after St Augustine. Since then I've learnt a bit more about the life and writings of St Augustine, and so when I saw it at the airport I was intrigued enough to buy it.
The book was a bit different to what I was expecting. I'm not sure what I was expecting, but it was a lot more preachy than I thought it would be. As an autobiography it was ok, but the thing I didn't like was St Augustine's attitude toward God. It's very much "all the worthwhile and good things I've done are all God's doing, and the bad things just examplify the areas I need to become closer to God".
The thing I don't like about this kind of attitude is that it ignores the abilities and the accomplishments of people. In Augustine's case, his transformation from a freewheeling rebelous youth to a respectable holy man. Regardless of what inspired Augustine, he made the decision to change and improved himself, and is worthy of respect for that and his other acts. His worth is his own, not just because in a few small ways he resembles God.
I tend to believe that what a person does is more important than the motivations. Recently deceased Pope John Paul II, a very pious and honorable man, accomplished many great things during his life, and you would have to go a long way to find someone who would say otherwise, even if they, like I do not share his beliefs. He was a good man because of what he did, not why.
As a contrast to the writing of St Augustine, I have also recently read some work of Friedrich Nietzsche's, the rather modestly entitled "Why I am So Wise". A brief essay on how Mr Nietzsche feels he's so much better than the rest of us, especially the Germans. Given that my previous knowledge of Nietzsche come's from a faction in a sci-fi show known as the Nietzschiens, who were a rather self serving bunch of people with a very narrow point of view. Anyway, overall I wasn't that impressed by the writing of Nietzsche, so must only assume that his other work is of slightly more merit than this short work.
The book was a bit different to what I was expecting. I'm not sure what I was expecting, but it was a lot more preachy than I thought it would be. As an autobiography it was ok, but the thing I didn't like was St Augustine's attitude toward God. It's very much "all the worthwhile and good things I've done are all God's doing, and the bad things just examplify the areas I need to become closer to God".
The thing I don't like about this kind of attitude is that it ignores the abilities and the accomplishments of people. In Augustine's case, his transformation from a freewheeling rebelous youth to a respectable holy man. Regardless of what inspired Augustine, he made the decision to change and improved himself, and is worthy of respect for that and his other acts. His worth is his own, not just because in a few small ways he resembles God.
I tend to believe that what a person does is more important than the motivations. Recently deceased Pope John Paul II, a very pious and honorable man, accomplished many great things during his life, and you would have to go a long way to find someone who would say otherwise, even if they, like I do not share his beliefs. He was a good man because of what he did, not why.
As a contrast to the writing of St Augustine, I have also recently read some work of Friedrich Nietzsche's, the rather modestly entitled "Why I am So Wise". A brief essay on how Mr Nietzsche feels he's so much better than the rest of us, especially the Germans. Given that my previous knowledge of Nietzsche come's from a faction in a sci-fi show known as the Nietzschiens, who were a rather self serving bunch of people with a very narrow point of view. Anyway, overall I wasn't that impressed by the writing of Nietzsche, so must only assume that his other work is of slightly more merit than this short work.
A few chronological notes
For the past 3 weeks I'v been visiting my sister in Thailand, and generally having a look see about the country. Unfortunately, one consequence of this is limited internet access, and no access to my own computer. As such, not much has been added to this blog. The entries following (above) this one were written by hand (novel concept) and will now be typed up for entry. More on the trip overall after I type these up.
Wednesday, March 30, 2005
Books of the Black variety
Today I splurged. I was looking for something to read on the plane to Thailand. But I couldn't find anything that I was interested in buying, so I ended up getting the collectors edition of the complete Black Books. Marvelous british comedy. I've spent most of my time since getting home watching the first disc. I think once I finish the disc I'll go back to the start and listen to the commentaries.
DVD commentaries are curious things. I've heard some really good ones, which give a lot of insight into what's going on and let you in on interesting trivia, but some can be really bad, and just seem like a bunch of yobbos going on about the show. I think the quality of a commentary is in inverse proportion to the number of people taking part. All the really good ones I've heard are just one person. The ones with three or four people are really unimpressive.
In the meantime I have to organise something to read on the flight. I think I'll burn a few audio books to listen to instead. That way I have all the fun of reading a book without actually reading. Maybe I can download a few of the Harry Potter novels. And Hitchhikers guide to the galaxy. I'll have to make sure I take some batteries with me.
Bored now, ending post
writing time: 19 minutes
DVD commentaries are curious things. I've heard some really good ones, which give a lot of insight into what's going on and let you in on interesting trivia, but some can be really bad, and just seem like a bunch of yobbos going on about the show. I think the quality of a commentary is in inverse proportion to the number of people taking part. All the really good ones I've heard are just one person. The ones with three or four people are really unimpressive.
In the meantime I have to organise something to read on the flight. I think I'll burn a few audio books to listen to instead. That way I have all the fun of reading a book without actually reading. Maybe I can download a few of the Harry Potter novels. And Hitchhikers guide to the galaxy. I'll have to make sure I take some batteries with me.
Bored now, ending post
writing time: 19 minutes
Tuesday, March 29, 2005
An end to job search training
At the moment I'm still on the dole. The main reason I haven't stopped handing in the forms is a lack of job security. Going in for 10 minutes twice in a month is less hassle than having to go through the whole new applicant stuff if I don't get my contract renewed at the end of any given month. And it's not like I'm costing the taxpayer much. I think the tax I pay from work would cover 20 minutes of some low grade civil servants pay for a month. And since I started working, I've got maybe a hundred dollars total, from the times when I was on a reduced roster.
But the most annoying part is a thing called job search training. After spending about 2 months on the dole, you have to attend job search training. This is where they say, ok you don't a job, so we're going to pretend that your job is looking for a job. Admittedly they do make concessions if you've got some work, and I've milked that for most of what it's worth. But tomorrow I have my completion interview, and I haven't done all the things I've meant to have done. The main thing I haven't done is the direct sucking up type of job searching, where you just call up people out of the blue and say "I'm so and so, this is what I can do, do you have any positions available that may be suited to my skills". Quite frankly, if I'm busy working I don't really want to have to do this. I'm going to try and wrangle out of some of it on a technicality, that it only says list x many companies that you will hassle, so that's a partial escape. And I think the person I have the interview with is somewhat sympathetic, and I have done most of the other less time consuming parts.
Well, all things must come to an end, and I hope the fact that I've been working at a regular job since I began the job search training, and still am is enough to get me over the line. And if not I may still have a get out of jail card. This Sunday I leave the country for three weeks to visit my sister. And the government won't give me money while I'm overseas, and are too stupid to just pause my payments. No, I have to go off newstart, and make a new application when I get back in the country. So perhaps I should just go off the payments now, and save myself the hassle.
Ah well, I'm going to stop typing now, and apply for another two jobs.
End Post
writing time: 32 minutes
But the most annoying part is a thing called job search training. After spending about 2 months on the dole, you have to attend job search training. This is where they say, ok you don't a job, so we're going to pretend that your job is looking for a job. Admittedly they do make concessions if you've got some work, and I've milked that for most of what it's worth. But tomorrow I have my completion interview, and I haven't done all the things I've meant to have done. The main thing I haven't done is the direct sucking up type of job searching, where you just call up people out of the blue and say "I'm so and so, this is what I can do, do you have any positions available that may be suited to my skills". Quite frankly, if I'm busy working I don't really want to have to do this. I'm going to try and wrangle out of some of it on a technicality, that it only says list x many companies that you will hassle, so that's a partial escape. And I think the person I have the interview with is somewhat sympathetic, and I have done most of the other less time consuming parts.
Well, all things must come to an end, and I hope the fact that I've been working at a regular job since I began the job search training, and still am is enough to get me over the line. And if not I may still have a get out of jail card. This Sunday I leave the country for three weeks to visit my sister. And the government won't give me money while I'm overseas, and are too stupid to just pause my payments. No, I have to go off newstart, and make a new application when I get back in the country. So perhaps I should just go off the payments now, and save myself the hassle.
Ah well, I'm going to stop typing now, and apply for another two jobs.
End Post
writing time: 32 minutes
Monday, March 14, 2005
Back online
Well, after the move and the period of internet deprivation I'm back online. And thank god for that. I'm so far behind on my regular net activities it's not funny. Take this for instance, it's been at least a month since the last time I put anything up on here. And I'm still waiting to find out how Stargate and Atlantis finish. Although not for much longer.
I started a game just before I moved, expecting to not be out of touch long. The games still going, it's on about turn 15 or so, and I've submitted moves for maybe 5 turns. I'm in a really shit position, but am still in the game. Now we'll see how much longer I can last.
I'm still working in a call center. I'm not quite sure. I'm obviously doing something right, as I started out on a 6 week contract 3 weeks before christmas, and I'm still there. But it seems every time the higher ups listen in on my calls, I've made a mistake. I'm still getting told off for not using names and response phrases enough, but I'm still working on it. We'll see if they keep me on after telling them I'm going to be away for three weeks next month.
Now that I'm back online it'll probably be easier for me to finish up the bullshit job search training that I'm going through right now.
I'm not typing anything too fascinating so I'll stop now.
End Post
Writing time: 50 minutes
I started a game just before I moved, expecting to not be out of touch long. The games still going, it's on about turn 15 or so, and I've submitted moves for maybe 5 turns. I'm in a really shit position, but am still in the game. Now we'll see how much longer I can last.
I'm still working in a call center. I'm not quite sure. I'm obviously doing something right, as I started out on a 6 week contract 3 weeks before christmas, and I'm still there. But it seems every time the higher ups listen in on my calls, I've made a mistake. I'm still getting told off for not using names and response phrases enough, but I'm still working on it. We'll see if they keep me on after telling them I'm going to be away for three weeks next month.
Now that I'm back online it'll probably be easier for me to finish up the bullshit job search training that I'm going through right now.
I'm not typing anything too fascinating so I'll stop now.
End Post
Writing time: 50 minutes
Tuesday, February 08, 2005
long time no write
So it's been a while since I've written anything here. Partly this is a lack of any major happenings. Now there are some so I guess I shoudl go over them.
I'm moving house soon. The new place is very close to the university. I'm still not sure about how it's going to turn out. One of the friends I'm moving in with is very unilateral about things. Has to have things his own way, and is very unwilling to compromise. Another is a bit of a neat freak, but it shouldn't be too bad as I tend to keep my mess within the limits of my room.
My job is going to be finished soon. Even though I got my contract extended, I missed out on a permanent position. I guess it just means I get a bit of time to look for a new job while still having something to do and get money from. There's a position I'm really keen on that I'm going to apply for tomorrow. It's a scientific assistant at a high school. The money's good, I can pretty much do everthing they want, plus I can do a whole heap of extra stuff that would be an advantage in the job. Hopefully all goes well.
Moving out of course means having to clean up the current place. I'll have to make an inventory and see just how much of the junk I've acquired I want to keep. I can think of a few things that I've got that I haven't touched since putting them in their current location when I moved in here a year ago. I'll probably have a bit of a wonder around and see if I can get anything for some of it.
End Post
Writing time: 130 minutes
I'm moving house soon. The new place is very close to the university. I'm still not sure about how it's going to turn out. One of the friends I'm moving in with is very unilateral about things. Has to have things his own way, and is very unwilling to compromise. Another is a bit of a neat freak, but it shouldn't be too bad as I tend to keep my mess within the limits of my room.
My job is going to be finished soon. Even though I got my contract extended, I missed out on a permanent position. I guess it just means I get a bit of time to look for a new job while still having something to do and get money from. There's a position I'm really keen on that I'm going to apply for tomorrow. It's a scientific assistant at a high school. The money's good, I can pretty much do everthing they want, plus I can do a whole heap of extra stuff that would be an advantage in the job. Hopefully all goes well.
Moving out of course means having to clean up the current place. I'll have to make an inventory and see just how much of the junk I've acquired I want to keep. I can think of a few things that I've got that I haven't touched since putting them in their current location when I moved in here a year ago. I'll probably have a bit of a wonder around and see if I can get anything for some of it.
End Post
Writing time: 130 minutes
Sunday, January 30, 2005
long time no post
I'm too tired to write anyhting right now. Perhaps tomorrow
End post
Writing time: 1 minute
End post
Writing time: 1 minute
Sunday, January 16, 2005
looking for a new home
I'm currently looking for a new place. A friend of mine wants to move out, so he, my current housemate, and myself are looking for a new place. It's not going well so far. I have my doubts that we will be able to find a place that meets the criteria we all have.
I'm starting to get a little worried that this may start causing problems. We found one place that seems ok, except that one of the rooms is only 7' x 11'. This is too small to fit all my stuff, and for some reason the other two seem to think I'm the one whose going to get the small room.
Tonight I found out that the friend who wants to move out wants to use the fact that he's going to do the yard work as a reason why he shouldn't have to pay for the phone or internet. This perhaps wouldn't be quite so frustrating if it weren't for the fact that he's the one who is absolutely insistent that we have to have a house with a yard as he wants to do yardwork.
All over this is getting quite frustrating. All I want is a room large enough to put all my stuff in, a shower with a decent showerhead, and being within walking distance of regular public transport, preferably a train station.
Time discontinuity here.
I got interrupted writing this by a discussion about whether we'll take the place and who will pay for what. We seem to have reached an agreement. I'll take the small room and pay a lot less rent.
Right now I'm having second thoughts about the deal. Right now I'm feeling bitter and resentful, mainly becuase I don't like it that the other two just assumed I'd be happy with the small room.
Now I'm not sure if I'm happy with this. I've already stopped doing one thing because I wasn't happy doing it. Why should I now go into a situation where I'm going to feel unhappy and bitter towards those I live with?
This is going to be tricky. The others are very keen on the place. And I've already changed my mind on this once.
The question now going through my head is why should I not now try and find someone to take my housemates room, and just stay where I am. I'm happy here, can fit all my stuff in my room, and it would solve a few hassles.
I'm definately not happy with this. Not being happy is a bad thing, and should be avoided. I guess that means we keep looking.
Writing time: 18 hours 7 minutes (a record perhaps? For me definately, the world? Who knows?)
I'm starting to get a little worried that this may start causing problems. We found one place that seems ok, except that one of the rooms is only 7' x 11'. This is too small to fit all my stuff, and for some reason the other two seem to think I'm the one whose going to get the small room.
Tonight I found out that the friend who wants to move out wants to use the fact that he's going to do the yard work as a reason why he shouldn't have to pay for the phone or internet. This perhaps wouldn't be quite so frustrating if it weren't for the fact that he's the one who is absolutely insistent that we have to have a house with a yard as he wants to do yardwork.
All over this is getting quite frustrating. All I want is a room large enough to put all my stuff in, a shower with a decent showerhead, and being within walking distance of regular public transport, preferably a train station.
Time discontinuity here.
I got interrupted writing this by a discussion about whether we'll take the place and who will pay for what. We seem to have reached an agreement. I'll take the small room and pay a lot less rent.
Right now I'm having second thoughts about the deal. Right now I'm feeling bitter and resentful, mainly becuase I don't like it that the other two just assumed I'd be happy with the small room.
Now I'm not sure if I'm happy with this. I've already stopped doing one thing because I wasn't happy doing it. Why should I now go into a situation where I'm going to feel unhappy and bitter towards those I live with?
This is going to be tricky. The others are very keen on the place. And I've already changed my mind on this once.
The question now going through my head is why should I not now try and find someone to take my housemates room, and just stay where I am. I'm happy here, can fit all my stuff in my room, and it would solve a few hassles.
I'm definately not happy with this. Not being happy is a bad thing, and should be avoided. I guess that means we keep looking.
Writing time: 18 hours 7 minutes (a record perhaps? For me definately, the world? Who knows?)
Friday, January 07, 2005
Time for another post
I'm a bit tired. I didn't sleep well last night, as it's been a bit hot recently, and I had an early shift today. A mere 13 hours between shifts isn't all that fun. Ah well, that's the price we pay. The other day they asked for expressions of interest for extended contracts and permanent part time positions, so hopefully the weekend won't be too busy so I can put together a reasonably impressive expression of interest. There are worse ways to pay your bills. Hopefully it goes ok. I may have a bit of trouble, as my first call monitoring didn't go to well. I forgot to do one important thing, which meant I didn't get a good result. I'll just have to wait and see.
I've been playing some diablo II recently, I started up a new assasin. I just killed Duriel for the first time, and contrary to usual form, I didn't die once. I think it was the speed, I was able to run away from him to escape properly.
My supervisors are going to be back in the country soon, so I'm going to have to make a decision about what I'm going to do in a month or two. I don't think I won't to go back. Right now I don't think that if I did go back I'd be any more productive than I was.
I think I've said before that there was a time where my future was all clear and planned, with an obvious sequence of events. I think I'm no longer the same person now as I was then. I'm more bitter, more wary of sentiment and emotion, and all round not as happy. I think I know when the change occured, its in the post that has yet to be finished (The writing time on that ones going to be impressive).
So now what should my plan be? Continue at a simple job, and find pleasure in the other aspects of life? Financially I think I can do it, but the prospect of engaging in a job like that, saying I'm going to do this now, is a bit daunting. Perhaps I can convince myself that it's just a temporary measure. It does pay better than centerlink, and they're much easier to deal with.
The longer term though is something I'm worried about. The thought of just having a job, and that being the main focus of my life is something that doesn't seem appealing. It lacks wow. I can't see myself telling someone this is how I spend most of my time and them being impressed. When you tell someone you're doing a PhD in physics, the response is: wow, you must be smart. But working in a call center, that's nothing special.
A friend of mine recently told me that I seem to be too concerned with what he called the GRAND IDEA. He said that I should be less concerned with my ultimate fate and appreciate the here and now. I think he's right in some ways. I have been trying to find a grand idea, but as I told him, I'm trying to replace something I once had, and longer have. Until it's gone, you don't really appreciate how reassuring it is to have a strong surety of purpose. A knowledge that there is a plan, there is a goal, and a rough idea of the path you're going to take. It made life much easier to take. Now I'm lost in the middle of nowhere, with no path in site, and I have no idea where to go.
Looking at most of what I've just typed, I mainly seem to be highlighting different facets of my problem, but not it's whole. If anyone can work out and concisely state what my problem is, please let me know. Knowing the problem is the first step to finding a solution.
End post
Writing time: 28 minutes
I've been playing some diablo II recently, I started up a new assasin. I just killed Duriel for the first time, and contrary to usual form, I didn't die once. I think it was the speed, I was able to run away from him to escape properly.
My supervisors are going to be back in the country soon, so I'm going to have to make a decision about what I'm going to do in a month or two. I don't think I won't to go back. Right now I don't think that if I did go back I'd be any more productive than I was.
I think I've said before that there was a time where my future was all clear and planned, with an obvious sequence of events. I think I'm no longer the same person now as I was then. I'm more bitter, more wary of sentiment and emotion, and all round not as happy. I think I know when the change occured, its in the post that has yet to be finished (The writing time on that ones going to be impressive).
So now what should my plan be? Continue at a simple job, and find pleasure in the other aspects of life? Financially I think I can do it, but the prospect of engaging in a job like that, saying I'm going to do this now, is a bit daunting. Perhaps I can convince myself that it's just a temporary measure. It does pay better than centerlink, and they're much easier to deal with.
The longer term though is something I'm worried about. The thought of just having a job, and that being the main focus of my life is something that doesn't seem appealing. It lacks wow. I can't see myself telling someone this is how I spend most of my time and them being impressed. When you tell someone you're doing a PhD in physics, the response is: wow, you must be smart. But working in a call center, that's nothing special.
A friend of mine recently told me that I seem to be too concerned with what he called the GRAND IDEA. He said that I should be less concerned with my ultimate fate and appreciate the here and now. I think he's right in some ways. I have been trying to find a grand idea, but as I told him, I'm trying to replace something I once had, and longer have. Until it's gone, you don't really appreciate how reassuring it is to have a strong surety of purpose. A knowledge that there is a plan, there is a goal, and a rough idea of the path you're going to take. It made life much easier to take. Now I'm lost in the middle of nowhere, with no path in site, and I have no idea where to go.
Looking at most of what I've just typed, I mainly seem to be highlighting different facets of my problem, but not it's whole. If anyone can work out and concisely state what my problem is, please let me know. Knowing the problem is the first step to finding a solution.
End post
Writing time: 28 minutes
Friday, December 31, 2004
The Lord of Dreams
Recently I've started reading The Sandman, by Neil Gaiman. This is a very impressive series of comics, much more than what one normally expects from comics. Many have said it, but it is true that it is very much a piece of literature, regardless of its medium.
In the introduction to one of the collections, Neil Gaiman relates how he was asked to describe the series in 25 words or less. He came up with: The Lord of Dreams learns that all things must change or die, and makes his decision. This is somewhat of a universal truth, and most of us choose to change.
For some time now, I've felt that I must change. I lack self discipline. I don't make plans, and sometimes when I do, I don't follow them (it depends on how much of events I control. Plans to see a movie at a certain time tend to happen. Plans to clean my room today tend to fall by the side).
I have no ambition. I have no grand goal of doing anything by anywhen. I have written (or at least thought of writing) before about how I have no purpose in life, no guiding principle. This is another facet of it. My needs are reasonably simple. An ok place to live, running water, a decent internet connection, food, access to public transport, shops close by, and a bit of spare cash after paying for all of this. These are not huge needs, and they suffice. But in a world obsessed with materialism and capitalism, they can seem a bit paltry. But the urge to acquire just because you can is hollow and unappealing. Similar logic applies to religion. Faith appears irrational and unsupportable, and seems inconsistent and the thing worshiped unworthy of our respect. But atheism, or humanism, or rationalism makes the universe a big lonely thing, with nothing to aspire to but self satisfaction.
I don't communicate much. I never have. At first, it was because those around me didn't respect me, but it later became habit. Solitude is a default ground state. And when I do talk to others, it is rarely about important things. Tonights episode of The Simpsons is not a topic to encourage depth of thought. I like to know what I'm talking about, and if I'm not sure how I feel, how can I talk about it. Some of the times, I can't even find the words. Nearly all communication is by words. If I don't have the words to descirbe something, how can I talk to someone about it.
I find it hard to emphasise with others. I find it hard to understand what their thinking, whats going on inside. I find it easy to ignore the plight of others. I find it annoying when people try to force their ideas on me. I don't want to give money to people like greenpeace, learn that god was an alien, or that Jesus is my saviour. If I want to do that, I'll go to the appropriate people. I don't bug them to support my points of view, so leave me to mine. I find it annoying when people don't understand what I'm trying to say or explain. I get frustrated when people don't know things I take for granted.
I don't get enough exercise. This I'm slowly improving with weekly jogs, but there's still a lot of room for improvement. It's been a long time since I really practised my juggling. About a six weeks before christmas I set a goal of losing about 3 kilos by christmas. I weighed myself a few days ago, and not only did I not lose that weight, I actually put on that much. I'd like to reconcile myself with the fact that muscle is denser than fat, but that I think is just deluding myself.
So those are a few of the things about me that need changing. And now I face a choice. And unlike Dream, I don't think I'm quite ready to accept the embrace of Death. So, now I have to find a way to make changes. I need to work out what the changes I'm going to make are. I need to decide to improve things. This, I'm quite sure, is going to be tricky.
Now is the eve of the new year, and I'm sitting here at home, alone, typing this while listening to The Games. I have never celebrated a new years eve. Years of spendng summers going back home, where very little iteresting occurs at said event have ingrained a habit of staying in.
And so, as is the tradition, I shall make a resolution. In the coming year I will change. And not just change as a response to events. I shall seek to improve myself, make myself a better person, a more complete person. Let's see how it goes.
End Post
Writing time: 37 minutes.
In the introduction to one of the collections, Neil Gaiman relates how he was asked to describe the series in 25 words or less. He came up with: The Lord of Dreams learns that all things must change or die, and makes his decision. This is somewhat of a universal truth, and most of us choose to change.
For some time now, I've felt that I must change. I lack self discipline. I don't make plans, and sometimes when I do, I don't follow them (it depends on how much of events I control. Plans to see a movie at a certain time tend to happen. Plans to clean my room today tend to fall by the side).
I have no ambition. I have no grand goal of doing anything by anywhen. I have written (or at least thought of writing) before about how I have no purpose in life, no guiding principle. This is another facet of it. My needs are reasonably simple. An ok place to live, running water, a decent internet connection, food, access to public transport, shops close by, and a bit of spare cash after paying for all of this. These are not huge needs, and they suffice. But in a world obsessed with materialism and capitalism, they can seem a bit paltry. But the urge to acquire just because you can is hollow and unappealing. Similar logic applies to religion. Faith appears irrational and unsupportable, and seems inconsistent and the thing worshiped unworthy of our respect. But atheism, or humanism, or rationalism makes the universe a big lonely thing, with nothing to aspire to but self satisfaction.
I don't communicate much. I never have. At first, it was because those around me didn't respect me, but it later became habit. Solitude is a default ground state. And when I do talk to others, it is rarely about important things. Tonights episode of The Simpsons is not a topic to encourage depth of thought. I like to know what I'm talking about, and if I'm not sure how I feel, how can I talk about it. Some of the times, I can't even find the words. Nearly all communication is by words. If I don't have the words to descirbe something, how can I talk to someone about it.
I find it hard to emphasise with others. I find it hard to understand what their thinking, whats going on inside. I find it easy to ignore the plight of others. I find it annoying when people try to force their ideas on me. I don't want to give money to people like greenpeace, learn that god was an alien, or that Jesus is my saviour. If I want to do that, I'll go to the appropriate people. I don't bug them to support my points of view, so leave me to mine. I find it annoying when people don't understand what I'm trying to say or explain. I get frustrated when people don't know things I take for granted.
I don't get enough exercise. This I'm slowly improving with weekly jogs, but there's still a lot of room for improvement. It's been a long time since I really practised my juggling. About a six weeks before christmas I set a goal of losing about 3 kilos by christmas. I weighed myself a few days ago, and not only did I not lose that weight, I actually put on that much. I'd like to reconcile myself with the fact that muscle is denser than fat, but that I think is just deluding myself.
So those are a few of the things about me that need changing. And now I face a choice. And unlike Dream, I don't think I'm quite ready to accept the embrace of Death. So, now I have to find a way to make changes. I need to work out what the changes I'm going to make are. I need to decide to improve things. This, I'm quite sure, is going to be tricky.
Now is the eve of the new year, and I'm sitting here at home, alone, typing this while listening to The Games. I have never celebrated a new years eve. Years of spendng summers going back home, where very little iteresting occurs at said event have ingrained a habit of staying in.
And so, as is the tradition, I shall make a resolution. In the coming year I will change. And not just change as a response to events. I shall seek to improve myself, make myself a better person, a more complete person. Let's see how it goes.
End Post
Writing time: 37 minutes.
Thursday, December 30, 2004
A new Entry
It's been a while. I've been working at my new job. Up until yesterday, it wasn't too bad. I spent about half my time waiting for a call. Today was different though. Once one call finished, another would come in. Ah well, I guess it's time to earn the money they pay me. My only concern is that it's a short term contract, with a possibility of extension, but currently I don't think the odds of continuing on are that good. The contract included the week before christmas and the aftermath, so I have the impression that this was seasonal work. Ah well, perhaps I should make sure to put some money away while it's coming in. That shouldn't be too tricky, as I've been rostered on for every public holiday, making 5 hours work worth $200 before tax. That should help the old bank account.
Christmas was ok. My uncle came over for dinner and we spent some time together. I didn't get too many presents, compared to previous years. A beanbag, some shirts, some books. Mum's overseas visiting my sister, and apparently I will be recieving some more clothes upon her return. Ah well, all things tend towards entropy.
The tsunami thing in the indian ocean is really uncool. Lots of people dead. Lots of homes ruined. And lots of people who have lost family, homes and now have to rebuild. My sister is currently in Thailand, as is Mum, but their both ok. Still, all those other people are in a really bad position.
That reminds of probably the most impressive thing I've seen about the company I'm working for. They're donating us $100k, plus they're going to match donations made by the employees. This creates a different impression to some of the stuff during training. One video was on how important it was to obey the law and stuff, because all the negative publicity when caught doing something wrong is really bad. Whatever happened to obeying the law because it's the right thing todo. And they've got these four ideals. And for each of them thre is a symbol. One of these ideals is build. and the symbol they picked for build is the impossible triangle (an example is here). The thing they chose to represent build can not be physically be built. It takes a certain type of mind to come up with something like that.
End Post
writing time: 37 minutes
Christmas was ok. My uncle came over for dinner and we spent some time together. I didn't get too many presents, compared to previous years. A beanbag, some shirts, some books. Mum's overseas visiting my sister, and apparently I will be recieving some more clothes upon her return. Ah well, all things tend towards entropy.
The tsunami thing in the indian ocean is really uncool. Lots of people dead. Lots of homes ruined. And lots of people who have lost family, homes and now have to rebuild. My sister is currently in Thailand, as is Mum, but their both ok. Still, all those other people are in a really bad position.
That reminds of probably the most impressive thing I've seen about the company I'm working for. They're donating us $100k, plus they're going to match donations made by the employees. This creates a different impression to some of the stuff during training. One video was on how important it was to obey the law and stuff, because all the negative publicity when caught doing something wrong is really bad. Whatever happened to obeying the law because it's the right thing todo. And they've got these four ideals. And for each of them thre is a symbol. One of these ideals is build. and the symbol they picked for build is the impossible triangle (an example is here). The thing they chose to represent build can not be physically be built. It takes a certain type of mind to come up with something like that.
End Post
writing time: 37 minutes
Monday, December 20, 2004
A Change of Location
I've moved this to a new location. The reason I did this was because I had let a small number of people I know know about this. Those people know who they are.
Knowing that those people know, and read this, has stopped me doing what this is about. Self-introspection, reflection and evaluation. It's a personal thing, and as it turns out, something I can't do with onlookers.
So for those few who knew of this, and have found the new location, please turn away. I thought I could share this with you, but I can't. This is nothing against you.
Random strangers I can tolerate. Feel free to peruse, and if you feel inclined, comment.
This may seem odd, wanting random people to read, but not those I know. This is because I need to do this by myself, without the help of those I normally rely on.
End post
writing time: 5 minutes
Knowing that those people know, and read this, has stopped me doing what this is about. Self-introspection, reflection and evaluation. It's a personal thing, and as it turns out, something I can't do with onlookers.
So for those few who knew of this, and have found the new location, please turn away. I thought I could share this with you, but I can't. This is nothing against you.
Random strangers I can tolerate. Feel free to peruse, and if you feel inclined, comment.
This may seem odd, wanting random people to read, but not those I know. This is because I need to do this by myself, without the help of those I normally rely on.
End post
writing time: 5 minutes
Saturday, December 18, 2004
World's Best Drunken Pool Story*
So, yesterday training for my job finished, and afterwards a number of those doing the training went to the bar down the road for a "graduation" celebration. And as it happened, there were some pool tables there, so after a while some of us started playing.
Now, I'm not exactly a pro, or even a talented amatuer, but I enjoy playing, and can usually manage to sink at least one ball in a game.
So, at the start of game 1, I had had one smirnoff black**, and was starting on my second. I got the third shot, after the other side sunk one of the orange balls (yeah, I know, the tables were small too), so I go for a purple into a corner pocket. Well, the purple went the wrong way, bounced off the black which then went into the pocket I was aiming to get the purple ball in. Game over. We continued anyway to get our moneys worth. The second drink lasted through the second game, which wasn't all that interesting.
So as the third game starts, I'm starting my third drink in about an hour and a half. The other side breaks and sinks a ball, and my partner on his go also sinks a shot. Then the other side sunk the white giving me two shots, starting from the D. So I look at the table, and I can place the white for a nice shot on one of the purple balls into the side pocket, which I proceed to sink. The whites now lined up for another nice shot, this time into a corner pocket, which I also sink, and another shot is lined up. As I make this third shot, I only lightly tap the white, and before I can stop myself, hit the white again, and sink a third ball. I'm pretty sure that this is a foul, and so give the other side their shot. He then shoots at a purple ball, and my partner calls foul on him. He disputes this, and there is a slight discussion as to who is what colour. As it turns out, I was orange. At this point I'm not exactly feeling too good. Nevertheless, the game continues, and my partner sinks another ball. When my next turn comes around, I manage to sink two balls, this time orange. Some more shots, I think the other side might have sunk another one ball, and my turn comes around again. I sink the last two oranges, and then the black. Victory.
So, a glorius combination of "boy was I doing good", and "how can you be so stupid". It was at that point I stopped drinking for the evening. I also declared my retirement from pool forever, being pretty much unable to ever top that without learning how to sink every ball from the break.
* By "world's", I mean my
** Smirnoff Black is a vodka mixed with some other stuff. about 7% alcohol by volume, with 1.9 australian standard drinks per bottle. The elapsed time for this adventure was between 1.5-2 hours
Writing time: 18 minutes
Now, I'm not exactly a pro, or even a talented amatuer, but I enjoy playing, and can usually manage to sink at least one ball in a game.
So, at the start of game 1, I had had one smirnoff black**, and was starting on my second. I got the third shot, after the other side sunk one of the orange balls (yeah, I know, the tables were small too), so I go for a purple into a corner pocket. Well, the purple went the wrong way, bounced off the black which then went into the pocket I was aiming to get the purple ball in. Game over. We continued anyway to get our moneys worth. The second drink lasted through the second game, which wasn't all that interesting.
So as the third game starts, I'm starting my third drink in about an hour and a half. The other side breaks and sinks a ball, and my partner on his go also sinks a shot. Then the other side sunk the white giving me two shots, starting from the D. So I look at the table, and I can place the white for a nice shot on one of the purple balls into the side pocket, which I proceed to sink. The whites now lined up for another nice shot, this time into a corner pocket, which I also sink, and another shot is lined up. As I make this third shot, I only lightly tap the white, and before I can stop myself, hit the white again, and sink a third ball. I'm pretty sure that this is a foul, and so give the other side their shot. He then shoots at a purple ball, and my partner calls foul on him. He disputes this, and there is a slight discussion as to who is what colour. As it turns out, I was orange. At this point I'm not exactly feeling too good. Nevertheless, the game continues, and my partner sinks another ball. When my next turn comes around, I manage to sink two balls, this time orange. Some more shots, I think the other side might have sunk another one ball, and my turn comes around again. I sink the last two oranges, and then the black. Victory.
So, a glorius combination of "boy was I doing good", and "how can you be so stupid". It was at that point I stopped drinking for the evening. I also declared my retirement from pool forever, being pretty much unable to ever top that without learning how to sink every ball from the break.
* By "world's", I mean my
** Smirnoff Black is a vodka mixed with some other stuff. about 7% alcohol by volume, with 1.9 australian standard drinks per bottle. The elapsed time for this adventure was between 1.5-2 hours
Writing time: 18 minutes
Wednesday, December 15, 2004
Let's see what comes out
I'm almost finished training for my new job. Tomorrow we'll be taking some actual calls, which should be interesting. I'm reasonably happy with my understanding of the computer programs involved, moreso than some others, but the actual talking to people bit will be a bit tougher for me than for the others I think.
I tend to be a man of very few words. There are many reasons for this. One is my tendency to ignore the rest of the world when concentrating on things. Another is a very insular focus. I don't talk to strangers on the bus for idle chit-chat. I don't really do idle chit-chat in general. Also, when I'm in a conversation, I tend to remain quite for most of the time, prefering to listen to what goes on. Most of the time I don't say much unless I feel I have something pertinant to contribute. Depending on the context and subject matter, the amount I have to say can vary a lot. There are some subjects I don't talk about, voluntarily or when drawn out upon the subject. In fact, I have even mangaed to aggravate people by my refusal to talk on occasion.
But now I'm veering into territory I'm not really willing to head into so we'll change pace. Thinking of a new topic. This is tricky. I recently heard that The Goodies will be coming to Australia next year and doing some shows around the place (BBC News), so I shall have to keep an eye out for when that is.
Hopefully it'll be at the Powerhouse, which is a great place and has had many good shows. The Powerhouse hosts a lot of comedy performances, as well as other stuff. Last year among other things I saw there was a one man performance of Animal Farm. One man, a ladder, a bucket, and another guy providing background music. It was quite impressive. The least impressive show I've seen there was a musical remake of Hamlet put into a corporate setting, with the state of Denmark being replaced by the corporation of something or other. My main complaint was that it was too heavy handed in its anti-globalisation message.
That's something I find unpleasant in many groups. I don't necessarily disagree with their message, but frequently I find their inability to accept other viewpoints as not good. As I have put it on many an occasion, I have a fundamental opposition to fundamental opposition. I don't really take seriously people who seem too die hard about their positions. Perhaps it's because I've never had a strong belief in a cause that I find myself unable to accept that others can devote themselves fully to something and just ignore other perspectives. But I'd like to think that the smart way of doing things is to go with what works, keep an open mind, and to be sceptical. Don't just accept every crackpots theory about how standing on your head for 3 hours a day will cure you of cancer, but if he can show you properly documented experimental results that show it works, then give him a chance.
That brings up something that really peeves me. The number of crack pots with all their different remedies, for everything from headaches to backpain, from insomnia to cancer. Most of them have nice looking commercials with people saying how good their product is, but none of them seem to explain how their product works, or provide any sort of scientific evidence backing up their claims. Some of them claim that their methods are beyond science, or revolutionarily different. If their product works, why would they be afraid of letting someone test it under controlled conditions.
Recently I've seen a few adds for magnetic blankets. I'm not quite sure what their meant to do, or how they do it. I've also seen a few guys selling them at the local store. I'm tempted to go up to them one day and ask them how they work. I've got the general plan of tyring to lead them to say that EM fields are somehow involved. Then I'll ask them that "Don't high voltage power lines create EM fields? And don't they cause cancer? So why are your EM fields good when those EM fields are bad? Won't your product give me cancer?" It'll be interesting to see how much I can make them squirm.
End Post
Writing time: 40 minutes
I tend to be a man of very few words. There are many reasons for this. One is my tendency to ignore the rest of the world when concentrating on things. Another is a very insular focus. I don't talk to strangers on the bus for idle chit-chat. I don't really do idle chit-chat in general. Also, when I'm in a conversation, I tend to remain quite for most of the time, prefering to listen to what goes on. Most of the time I don't say much unless I feel I have something pertinant to contribute. Depending on the context and subject matter, the amount I have to say can vary a lot. There are some subjects I don't talk about, voluntarily or when drawn out upon the subject. In fact, I have even mangaed to aggravate people by my refusal to talk on occasion.
But now I'm veering into territory I'm not really willing to head into so we'll change pace. Thinking of a new topic. This is tricky. I recently heard that The Goodies will be coming to Australia next year and doing some shows around the place (BBC News), so I shall have to keep an eye out for when that is.
Hopefully it'll be at the Powerhouse, which is a great place and has had many good shows. The Powerhouse hosts a lot of comedy performances, as well as other stuff. Last year among other things I saw there was a one man performance of Animal Farm. One man, a ladder, a bucket, and another guy providing background music. It was quite impressive. The least impressive show I've seen there was a musical remake of Hamlet put into a corporate setting, with the state of Denmark being replaced by the corporation of something or other. My main complaint was that it was too heavy handed in its anti-globalisation message.
That's something I find unpleasant in many groups. I don't necessarily disagree with their message, but frequently I find their inability to accept other viewpoints as not good. As I have put it on many an occasion, I have a fundamental opposition to fundamental opposition. I don't really take seriously people who seem too die hard about their positions. Perhaps it's because I've never had a strong belief in a cause that I find myself unable to accept that others can devote themselves fully to something and just ignore other perspectives. But I'd like to think that the smart way of doing things is to go with what works, keep an open mind, and to be sceptical. Don't just accept every crackpots theory about how standing on your head for 3 hours a day will cure you of cancer, but if he can show you properly documented experimental results that show it works, then give him a chance.
That brings up something that really peeves me. The number of crack pots with all their different remedies, for everything from headaches to backpain, from insomnia to cancer. Most of them have nice looking commercials with people saying how good their product is, but none of them seem to explain how their product works, or provide any sort of scientific evidence backing up their claims. Some of them claim that their methods are beyond science, or revolutionarily different. If their product works, why would they be afraid of letting someone test it under controlled conditions.
Recently I've seen a few adds for magnetic blankets. I'm not quite sure what their meant to do, or how they do it. I've also seen a few guys selling them at the local store. I'm tempted to go up to them one day and ask them how they work. I've got the general plan of tyring to lead them to say that EM fields are somehow involved. Then I'll ask them that "Don't high voltage power lines create EM fields? And don't they cause cancer? So why are your EM fields good when those EM fields are bad? Won't your product give me cancer?" It'll be interesting to see how much I can make them squirm.
End Post
Writing time: 40 minutes
Friday, December 10, 2004
Sometimes good things happen
I was wandering around the web today and found something among the news that doesn't make me despair for the future of humanity. In fact, it did quite the opposite. It seems that the nations of South America are forming their own little mini-EU. Yesterday, the leaders of twelve South American nations signed the Declaration of Cuzco, a statement of intent to unify South America, in much the same way Europe has with the EU.
All in all, I think this is a good thing. Cooperation is a much better way of doing things then bickering, and making it easier for people to trade, travel, and learn about each other is always going to help. I think you just have to look at all the former Warsaw pact nations looking to join the EU shows just how advantageous such a joining together can accomplish.
Working together South America should be able to improve their lot even more. Surely just the advantages of providing a unified front when dealing with the USA should make this worthwhile.
So in this, I wish the people of South America all the best, and hope that it all works out.
All in all, I think this is a good thing. Cooperation is a much better way of doing things then bickering, and making it easier for people to trade, travel, and learn about each other is always going to help. I think you just have to look at all the former Warsaw pact nations looking to join the EU shows just how advantageous such a joining together can accomplish.
Working together South America should be able to improve their lot even more. Surely just the advantages of providing a unified front when dealing with the USA should make this worthwhile.
So in this, I wish the people of South America all the best, and hope that it all works out.
Monday, December 06, 2004
Gainfully employed?
Tomorrow I enter the workforce. After a bit of a mess, I have a job. And after the last fiasco, a job that pays wages. It's a bit of an odd situation though, where I'm not actually employed by the company I'm doing the work for. That company pays the company that's employing me, and then they pay me. The only advantage that I can see in the whole scheme is that it may make it easier to get rid of someone if they're no good, without all the hassles of firing them yourself. Just tell the recruitment agency that we don't want that person here anymore and let them sort it out.
So tomorrow I start 9 days of training, 8:30 to 5. And then I work 25 hours a week. The pay is such that it's about the same as what I used to get, so that'll be nice. I'm not quite sure why I'll need nine days of training for the job though. As a customer service thingy, I believe my job is to take calls from stores that offer credit, listen to them explain why their customer should be approved for credit, take all the details, and then tell them if the computer says yay or nay. Surely it can't be that complicated. I just hope that nothing too important was covered on the first day, as I'm sort of a last minute hiree, and the other people starting in the job will be getting a full ten days training.
Hopefully there won't be too many training videos. Who was it who mamaged to convince everyone that an asinine video that assumes the mental capacities of a 10 year old would make a better way of training someone than having someone who knows their shit come in and actually explain the stuff? And then, most people top it off by having some yahoo reading from a bit of paper accompanying the video, who have marvelous contributions to add about how the're unsure of how to use the VCR. Hasn't everyone caught on to the fact that the play button has a single triangle on it and the stop button has a square on it. It's not that complicated people.
Ah well, I'm getting paid for the training, and at a much better rate than my last endevour. In fact, I think the training period will pay off my credit card and pay for my christmas shopping. The situation would be quiite so worrying if it weren't for the internet bil that just went through, or else I'd have a bit more leeway financially. But it should all be ok now.
So tomorrow I start 9 days of training, 8:30 to 5. And then I work 25 hours a week. The pay is such that it's about the same as what I used to get, so that'll be nice. I'm not quite sure why I'll need nine days of training for the job though. As a customer service thingy, I believe my job is to take calls from stores that offer credit, listen to them explain why their customer should be approved for credit, take all the details, and then tell them if the computer says yay or nay. Surely it can't be that complicated. I just hope that nothing too important was covered on the first day, as I'm sort of a last minute hiree, and the other people starting in the job will be getting a full ten days training.
Hopefully there won't be too many training videos. Who was it who mamaged to convince everyone that an asinine video that assumes the mental capacities of a 10 year old would make a better way of training someone than having someone who knows their shit come in and actually explain the stuff? And then, most people top it off by having some yahoo reading from a bit of paper accompanying the video, who have marvelous contributions to add about how the're unsure of how to use the VCR. Hasn't everyone caught on to the fact that the play button has a single triangle on it and the stop button has a square on it. It's not that complicated people.
Ah well, I'm getting paid for the training, and at a much better rate than my last endevour. In fact, I think the training period will pay off my credit card and pay for my christmas shopping. The situation would be quiite so worrying if it weren't for the internet bil that just went through, or else I'd have a bit more leeway financially. But it should all be ok now.
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