Life is hard for the beautiful. All those online social networking and dating sites are full of people who are, well, not beautiful. And it wouldn't do to be seen online associating with someone of the non-beautiful inclination.
You might think BeautifulPeople.com might be an answer to this horrible, unfair dilemma. An online dating and social networking site where to join you have to be judged beautiful enough by the existing members sounds like just the thing for beautiful people wanting to avoid slumming it with the beautifully challenged masses.
But even with this great aid, life is still difficult for the beauties who walk among us. Apparently, over this Christmas/New Years period some members indulged a little too much and might have put on a little weight. Not too unusual an occurrence, but it was enough to get 5000 members kicked out for getting too fat. Those poor people. Being judged like that. It's so unfair.
Of course, once my application for the site gets approved, this post and any related disparaging remarks will disappear into the ether.
Showing posts with label Ha-Ha. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Ha-Ha. Show all posts
Wednesday, January 06, 2010
Friday, February 29, 2008
Hoisted upon their own petard
Most readers will no doubt be aware of what has been dubbed the sub-prime mortgage crisis. It seems a few years ago, a bunch of American financial institutions while seeking new ways to make money decided that it might be a good idea to give home loans to individuals with less than stellar credit histories. Now a lot of those individuals wanted to get a home loan, but couldn't afford the interest rates the banks would offer them. So, the banks, wanting to make a deal said, OK, we'll give you a cheap interest rate for the first few years then. The more astute individuals asked, but what happens when the interest goes back up. I still won't be able to pay the loan. To which the banks replied, No worries. The value of the home will go up, and you'll improve your credit history by paying off the mortgage, so before the interest rates go back up you can refinance. At which point many signed on the dotted line, and all were happy.
Well, almost everybody. Because the banks realised, hey, we've got a lot of loans with a high risk of default and we still haven't made that much money yet because we're giving them cheap interest for a few years, and we need cash to make more deals. What can we do?
We can sell our interest in the mortgages. Someone else gives us a bunch of cash now, and we give them a slow trickle of cash as people pay off their mortgages.
Great. Let's do it.
Oh, no one wants to buy these. How about a package deal? We give them 9 safe mortgages and 1 risky one as a bunch.
That worked. And so it went. Banks got into loan deals, wanted to get rid of the risk and sold off their interests in the loans. Some went bust and their loans were bought by other companies. There has all round been a lot of moving around bits and pieces so no one was stuck with the hot potato of a bad loan.
Recently, this caught up with a lot of people. The cheap interest rate periods were finishing, house prices hadn't risen, refinancing was as easy as people had been told, and foreclosures abounded.
Except for one man. One bulwark against the mighty tide of foreclosures. The man who had a secret that allowed him to stand against those who would take his home from him. And no, it was not pay in time.
The thing that makes Joe Lents stand apart from the crowd is this. No one seems to own his mortgage. He hasn't made a payment on his $1.5 million loan since 2002. Companies have tried to foreclose on him several times. And all he does is say "Prove it's you I owe the money to". And it works. In all the financial shenanigans and wheeling and dealing, something got lost along the way. In trying to hide themselves from the risk, the banks have hid themselves from the rights to collect on the debt.
And it looks like Joe is not alone. Judges aren't being so lenient about the matter any more, and more debtors are forcing their creditors to put up or shut up.
End Post
Writing time: 20 minutes
Time since last post: 30 minutes
Current media: None
Well, almost everybody. Because the banks realised, hey, we've got a lot of loans with a high risk of default and we still haven't made that much money yet because we're giving them cheap interest for a few years, and we need cash to make more deals. What can we do?
We can sell our interest in the mortgages. Someone else gives us a bunch of cash now, and we give them a slow trickle of cash as people pay off their mortgages.
Great. Let's do it.
Oh, no one wants to buy these. How about a package deal? We give them 9 safe mortgages and 1 risky one as a bunch.
That worked. And so it went. Banks got into loan deals, wanted to get rid of the risk and sold off their interests in the loans. Some went bust and their loans were bought by other companies. There has all round been a lot of moving around bits and pieces so no one was stuck with the hot potato of a bad loan.
Recently, this caught up with a lot of people. The cheap interest rate periods were finishing, house prices hadn't risen, refinancing was as easy as people had been told, and foreclosures abounded.
Except for one man. One bulwark against the mighty tide of foreclosures. The man who had a secret that allowed him to stand against those who would take his home from him. And no, it was not pay in time.
The thing that makes Joe Lents stand apart from the crowd is this. No one seems to own his mortgage. He hasn't made a payment on his $1.5 million loan since 2002. Companies have tried to foreclose on him several times. And all he does is say "Prove it's you I owe the money to". And it works. In all the financial shenanigans and wheeling and dealing, something got lost along the way. In trying to hide themselves from the risk, the banks have hid themselves from the rights to collect on the debt.
And it looks like Joe is not alone. Judges aren't being so lenient about the matter any more, and more debtors are forcing their creditors to put up or shut up.
End Post
Writing time: 20 minutes
Time since last post: 30 minutes
Current media: None
Tuesday, August 21, 2007
Not How I Want To Go
In the news lately is this unusual story of a woman who was killed by her pet camel when it tried to mate with her.
There is no way someone can keep their dignity after this. And it's not going to be forgotten. It doesn't matter what else the woman did during her life, she'll be remembered as the lady who got killed by a randy camel. And imagine what it will be like explaining this one to St Peter.
St Peter: And how did you die?
Lady: My pet camel tried to mate with me
St Peter: What the fuck?
So here's sympathy to the woman's family and hope that this never happens to me (if it does, I want a postmortem name change).
End Post
Writing time: 6 minutes
Time since last post: two days
Current media: none (it's too early for music)
There is no way someone can keep their dignity after this. And it's not going to be forgotten. It doesn't matter what else the woman did during her life, she'll be remembered as the lady who got killed by a randy camel. And imagine what it will be like explaining this one to St Peter.
St Peter: And how did you die?
Lady: My pet camel tried to mate with me
St Peter: What the fuck?
So here's sympathy to the woman's family and hope that this never happens to me (if it does, I want a postmortem name change).
End Post
Writing time: 6 minutes
Time since last post: two days
Current media: none (it's too early for music)
Sunday, November 12, 2006
Sucks to be in Australia
This to everyone in Australia who's missing bananas because they're so expensive. Yesterday I bought 4 bananas for 138 yen. That's $1.53. The last bananas I bought in Australia was $13 for three bananas.
End Post
Writing time: 3 minutes
Time since last post: 1 day
Current media: Battlestar Galactica 3x07 A Measure of Salvation
End Post
Writing time: 3 minutes
Time since last post: 1 day
Current media: Battlestar Galactica 3x07 A Measure of Salvation
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